Dreams and Crossroads

I dreamed about a tape measure last night.  My dad was still alive, and I was buying him a Christmas present.

He was hard to buy for...a simple man who was happiest walking in the very field you see pictured above. I wanted to give him something other than the usual socks or underwear.  I found this unique tape measure, in my dream, which was actually two tape measures side by side.  I thought he could use it in his little shop/workbench in the basement.  It was sold with other crafty type stuff included in the box, similar to things I had seen in the nooks and crannies of his work table.  I also got him a paperback novel, which Mom scolded me about, "You know he can't read anymore!"  Okay, I thought in my dream, I won't give him the book.  The double tape measure will be enough.

I woke up, dream so vivid, and I asked God what it meant.  I may let you know when He reveals it. I have learned that often God will let me know what He wants me to know when I ask...it just usually isn't immediate.  

I will hear His voice when I am walking or blow-drying my hair or driving.  It will hit me all-of-the-sudden. I have learned to pay attention.  It is not an audible voice, but a strong thought that hits my mind and heart at the same time.  

So, I don't yet know what He wants to tell me from my dream.  There is also the possibility that the dream is about my subconscious-self speaking to me, revealing what my heart believes is true.  That is good information to have as well.

Once, many years ago, I had a dream about going to church in my bathrobe and curlers.  I was sitting near the front, and on this particular Sunday, the pews moved and revolved so that everyone saw me and I felt embarrassed and woefully unprepared for worship.  

I asked God, when I woke up, what the dream meant.  I was sure it was from Him.  I was frustrated when He did not answer immediately.

But then, hours later, as I opened my mouth to sing in the worship service, the meaning hit me suddenly and clearly...it was like a "whoosh!"  

I sensed God speaking, "Janice, you would never come to church physically unprepared...you always look your best.  How many times have you come to church spiritually and emotionally prepared?  How do you prepare your heart for worship?"

That was a revelation.  That was a call to respond.  During that season of my life, I started to attend a prayer meeting early in the morning before church.  I sensed that I needed to pray before I attended the service, to prepare as much internally as I always did externally.

When God asks something specific of me and I KNOW it, I have a choice.  I have a choice to obey or not. To whom much is given, much is required.  (Reading the Bible is life-changing but loaded...once I know His will and His plan, I am faced with decisions.)  Sure, if I choose not to do as He asks, I can be forgiven. But that forgiveness did not come cheap to God.  Ask Him about Jesus.

My holiness is not dependent on my righteousness, it is based on Christ's righteousness.  It is based on accepting and knowing that it is only because of Jesus that I am "saved."

But...walking with God is a relationship.  It is an opportunity to grow deeper in love with Him and to grow into maturity and into a life-that-is-truly-life.  An opportunity to become who I was created to be.  THAT cannot happen without obedience.

We face this crossroad daily, those of us who call ourselves Christian.  We have forks in the road where we get to choose to obey or to do our own thing.  Sometimes we feel that we are getting away with something when we say no to God and know that He still loves us and forgives us.  But we are lying to ourselves.  And even though there is no escaping God's love, there is also no escaping some of the consequences of disobedience.

It is true that He loves us more than we can know.  He will forgive us if we repent, but we are not getting away with anything...we are cheating ourselves out of the life that we were created to live.  When we say "no" to God, we deny ourselves deeper intimacy with our Creator.  We stifle our own spritual growth and growth as human beings.  

Saying "yes" can be painful and require sacrifice.  But the joy...the joy and peace is SO worth it.  

I'm not gonna lie and say I've learned my lesson.  I will still say "no" to God at times...I am human and I am selfish and I struggle to say "yes."  My desire is to learn to say "Yes!" more and more so that the "no's" are fleeting.  

With each "yes" I am stepping closer to His heart.

"My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow Me..."  

John 10:27 KJV